I’m not sure if you believe that, if you do then you’re either in pharmaceuticals or you’re a horses ass. Or both. Those of us who have children that go to school and leave our homes quite often are not looking forward to standing next to someone in the checkout line that doesn’t know how to cover their mouth when they sneeze. I just want you to know that this makes me not like you.
This year within the past two weeks my kids have caught the croup just from parents sending their kids to school sick. Please don’t be that parent, I still have a three year old. I understand that you can’t always miss work, your babysitter is sick. Hell I know daycare doesn’t accept kids that are sick. We don’t want your bugs. My three year old coming up to me and sharing snot kisses with me is enough to make me lovingly want to hurl.
If you haven’t ever been around the flu bug, here are a few tips.
Cover your cough:
Yes, that’s right. Don’t be that person I am standing next to in line at Wal-Mart. This is the most disgusting thing of the cold and flu just for the simple fact there is mucus flying everywhere. You want to see me hurl go ahead and cough up a loogie next to me. I promise you will see what color my lunch is. So do me and my children that I have to pin down and wash with hand sanitizer a favor and cover your mouth. I’m not your girlfriend I don’t want your bugs, I don’t think she does either.
I’ve seen some nasty stuff between the medical profession, the Army and having kids. I know what lives on your hands and it’s not invited to come home with me. So if you’re that guy that shakes and doesn’t wash, then I’m not surprised your coughing.
Keep your ass in bed:
If you are genuinely sick, please stay home. I think everyone at some point in there life has had the ‘I’m not going to work’ today bug because you have a case of the f-it’s. Right on, I get those too. If you look like a bag of ass and probably have a case of the gomboo, I know I’m going to be the person inching away from you.
Stay up on your flu shot:
I hate shots, everyone hates shots, well there are the few that don’t mind them. You can keep them until flu season. This is one time, regardless of how much I hate them that I suck it up, look the other way. The reason for this, my kids. I would do anything to protect them. One of those is vaccinations. If you don’t believe in them, hey that’s cool. As much as I love to be around people, okay maybe not much, but I still do hold social gatherings from time to time, I can’t say you’re going to be invited during cold and flu season though.
I know that we hear these every year. People avoid them every year, hey I agree! I’m not a fan of having this pounded down my throat. Let’s not forget though with the cold and flu season comes RSV season. I have a three year old. I know that they are almost out of that window where it’s dangerous. This is one time where all jokes are aside if you’re sick or have a infant or toddler stay away from each other. The nurses and doctors at the hospital have enough to worry about. YOU have enough to worry about! Be smart. Don’t bring your tiny ones around someone that might give you the worst hospital visit of your life. They are so much more important then that one visit that could cost you more than just a visit to the hospital.
Remember to take care of yourselves:
If you do get sick here are some ways to take care of yourself so that it’s more comfortable. I don’t think that there is a miracle cure out there for a virus like these but you can make yourselves comfortable.
Fluids, fluids, fluids!! Drink Water!!
If you’re like me and drink one to two pots of coffee a day that still counts, but water might be a better choice at this time. If you can’t drink water try some of these things.
Hot Tea: one of my favorites, helps break up phlegm and feels nice going down. I mix lemon juice and honey with mine. Some people like to mix it with whiskey for a hot totty. Sometimes this type of self-medicating isn’t bad ‘if’ you can handle the liquor. If you can’t just stick to tea, lemon, and honey. No one likes throwing up.
Hot broths: my favorite is ginger and garlic. I know that it sounds gross, it works very well for me. If you can’t do this one try beef or chicken. They also have vegetable broth too. It works the same as hot tea, I don’t think I would put whiskey in it though.
Let’s not forget the over the counter meds. I usually do Alka-Seltzer Plus Severe Cold and Flu just because for me it helps with stomach aches and has the extra kick in it. Everyone has their own that works for them, I sincerely hope that you don’t need any of these.
I wish everyone a healthy cold and flu season. If you’ve been blessed like my house has and will have it circling all year despite your best bleaching efforts I wish you luck getting rid of it. You have my sympathy!
Then if you still aren’t digging the fluids try Pedialyte, Gatorade, PowerAde etc. Popsicles are magical!
Don’t be afraid to go generic.
Last but least, if you’re drinking lots of fluids I know this is gross but the more you pee the faster you flush your system. Stay hydrated.
Heres to another cold and flu season guys! Stay healthy!
Thanks for reading…
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